A Sarcastic New Year

The New Year has come
And isn’t it strange?
You’re thinking right now
“I should make a big change!”

But what will you do
For a better this year
Will you limit your drinking
To cases of beer?

Is it time to work out
And buy a gym pass
Or pay for a new way
To sit on your ass?

It’s time to quit smoking
Your lungs are affected
Just stick to the weed
While your kids are neglected!

Is it time to eat healthy?
You must find a way
You should eat one good meal
Then have twenty cheat days!

You should go back to school
And get a degree
Ah, fuck it! Stay home!
‘Cause welfare is free!

There is so much to change
Yet time is so lean
Perhaps you should save some
For twenty fifteen!

Or wait, better yet
I have a solution
Just blame someone else
For your poor execution!

You know…

If it’s not too offensive
And not too intrusive
Just grow some real balls
And stop the excuses

Happy New Year

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